It’s not a secret that I’m a working mother. I’m a married mama of 2 preteen girls. In working in healthcare, the hardest thing is to leave on time. And after 12 hours of call lights and bodily fluids, all I want to do is crawl into a hot shower, with my empty bed to greet me.
I drive 30 minutes each way across the vindictive highway known as I-270. Along the 30 minute stretch of highway, I normally listen to music–loud. As is my habit since I learned to drive. I let my thoughts wander and appreciate my own company.
I rarely think about work when I am on the way to it. I think of all the projects I’m doing. Grocery shopping. Shopping for myself. I make time to be me. Not the wife. Not the author. Not the budding mogul. I think about me. Those 30 minutes prepare me for the 12-hour shift of getting the needs of other people met. I am learning that taking time for myself is never a bad thing–it makes me a better woman, to become a better mother.
After helping people, wiping orifices, and chasing lights up and down the halls, 7:00 am is a Godsend! When I go to my car, I sit. I have to remember to shift back into being a mother, and just me again. I think about if my kids got up on their alarms. I frown about my husband being up–believing that he probably isn’t. The morning commute is always quicker. I don’t know or understand it. But, I have a Go Home Mix playlist in my Apple Music app. It normally starts with the song All The Stars from the Black Panther soundtrack. It’s made up of songs that I can and do sing along with to get home. The mornings where my husband doesn’t pick me up, he’s afraid that I will fall asleep on the way home.
The drive home is taxing, it is affirming and it is an exercise in faith in early morning rush hour. But once I’m home? And the world is quiet again? I shower. Close my eyes, and become me all over again.
[image from michellesingelton.com]